I’m not one to bring guild issues onto the intrawebs and even now I won’t be for the most part, BUT semi-recent occurences (over the last few months) have led me to believe my opinion on social issues should be made public.
We have had a massive influx of new members in BoO (even though they are technically not new anymore) and some social issues have occurred since then. As is to be expected when new personalities begin to co-mingle. Due to the questions I’ve been receiving on massive influx from several people rather than trying to explain myself to each and every one I will now be able to direct them to this post when regarding to most social issues and my perspective of them.
I actually already stated most of this in a comment on a guildee’s blog Krikket *you should TOTALLY go read that* and my comment was slightly of topic from the actual post and more referencing other comments so I’ve decided to bring it here to be in a better context.
*Mario Voice* Here We Go! (i love earworming the intrawebs)
When people get together we are going to disagree on some things. It is downright inevitable just like people with more in common will tend to spend more time with each other. You see this everywhere from pre-school to retirement communities.
I guess I’ve always found myself in a position that I tend to connect to people somehow in some way. Even as guild leader I at least knew all the members (which consisted solely of raiders) on a first name basis.
Maybe i’m some freak mutant who’s power is being ridiculously social. Or i may just have that personality that most people just can’t hate (or won’t tell me in any shape or form that they do)and is compatible with so many others.
One thing I do know is I can’t understand how people refuse to see each other’s points of view, and how some are constantly butting heads just for the sake of fighting. Which is probably why I SUCK when it comes to solving fights/arguments.
I don’t think a proper social atmosphere can be controlled by anyone as a group or an individual. It is simply something that happens by chance, or by looking in the right places or possibly a combination of both.
I’m a frat boy; by my demeanor and interests and even the way I look most people would NEVER know that. I was invited to join because of my grades, no one expected me to be a contributing member of the house. the people that run the place just wanted to look good and chased after a guy with a high GPA to recruit. Yet when I finally moved in, I connected with some other guys on a social level I didn’t even know was possible, despite our differences. Not because we made an outward effort of some kind (or at least i didnt) but because it just happened. The same thing happened when I joined BoO, I did slightly well as a PuG in one of their raids and was invited to join. I blended in socially quite well, and the fact that i did has been pointed out to me several times and my response is always “But i didn’t do anything”. Eventually I was offered an Officer position and for the most part I take it very seriously but never to the point where I know I won’t enjoy it.
Yet circumstances do not always play out this well. To recount a story; my first roomates and I constantly fought. We introduced ourselves after the first day and moving in and everything was quiet for a few days. I come back from class one day and one of my roommates EXPLODES in my face, I don’t even remember about what right now. I just looked at him blankly and when he finally finished screaming at the top of his lungs and a crowd had formed at our door. I proceeded to tell him I didn’t like being yelled at for no reason, and his anger with other issues going on in his life were no excuse for venting his frustrations on me. He looked at me in disbelief and went to his room. The peak of our fighting happened when he came back from a night of drinking absolutely shit faced and proceeded to kick in my door and attack me. I won’t go into detail but I ended up putting him through a wall and calling the cops while he was still in it. He never spoke to me after that.
After my own experiences I’ve learned a few things when it comes to social “relationships”
1.Sometimes they are inevitable and completely random
2.Small issues will eventually become huge ones
3.Location is a key, not a lockpick
4.Everyoen has something in common with everyone, even if it’s just being human.
5.Likewise everyone has differences
6.Good relationships cannot be forced, bad ones can
7.Some people are just not social
8. Body language speaks louder than words (of course on the internet this point is moot, but tone serves a similar purpose. and yes TEXT can have a tone. by typing TEXT in all caps in the last setence I changed the tone of that word DO NOT ARGUE WITH ME >.< *huggles*)
I tend to have a different view than most people when it comes to alot of things. This could be because of my background, it could just be who I am and nothing to do with my past. It could even be a genetic blueprint of what my personality was meant to be. Who nows, at this stage it does not really matter.
What is important is that I at least try not to cause problems, when I know I can do it I solve them, when I can’t I simply avoid or get rid of them.
While it may be expecting to much; i think everyone else should do the same.